As I get older, I realize what a dumbass I used to be. I know that some of you are raising an eyebrow and saying, "Used to be?" The fact that I know of your doubts proves my point.

With my newly found wisdom comes an ability to see what a dumbass everyone else is. I am forever amazed at the drivel that comes out of people's pie holes. Last year, I was talking to a friend of mine about a Mormon family that I knew. I was telling him that it seems that the Mormons lead a righteous life. They have great values, great families, and they are kind and generous. A lady that I didn't even know (turns out she was one of my bosses) butted in and said, "Too bad they're all going to hell!" How did she know?

I believe that I stopped being a dumbass about 15 years ago. That was when I stopped smoking. People always think that they are smart if they have a fag hanging out of their mouth. I quit putting fags in my mouth, and VOILA!! I was a friggin' genius. And fags have really gotten expensive, especially the longs.

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This Sucks

There has been a tragedy on my wife's side of the family. Her sister was taken from this world sooner than anyone could have expected. It is a great loss. Do not read any further if your faith cannot be tested.

I. Why would a great and merciful God allow something so wrong as this, and other tragedies? Some say it is the duality of man. You cannot experience happiness without sorrow, good without evil, etc.. Others say it is God's will. I say baloney. Thomas Jefferson was a deist who believed that God created the world like a watch. Then he wound it up and walked away. So what happens, happens. Who knows? ---- not me.

II. The Hindus. and later the Buddhists, believe in Karma, a great concept!! Do over until you get it right. I like the Buddhist better because you can take a shortcut to Nirvana --- no, not the grunge group.

III. Someone at the hospice commented that they were glad she was baptized a Lutheran, no matter what she is today. I guess that they didn't understand that Martin Luther was baptized a Roman Catholic, ordained a priest, and would not have left the Catholic Church if he wouldn't have been kicked out because he questioned authority.

IV. What about the Humanists. They believe that we should do the right thing just because it is the right thing to do.

V. The Jews have a great idea. If you live according to the Torah (first five books of the Old Testament), then you will see the face of God. If you don,t then you will not see the face of God. There is no Hell.

VI. The Muslims believe in the Old Testament, but they have the Koran instead of the New Testament. How can you hate a religion that says if you die a martyr, then virgins will meet you in Heaven. I hope it is female virgins. What if it is really Virginians. Jefferson and Washington are probably waiting for Osama with knives.

VII. Finally this rant is almost over. I am working on an all encompassing religion. I plan on calling it UNILIGION. It will take all the best parts of all the religions of the world, and interface them into a unified theory of belief. The best part ------------ There will be like 80 holidays per year.

Scattershooting

A girls' basketball team from a Christian High School beat another team 100-0. Does that statement need a comment, or does it stand alone.
One time I asked a fella I used to know what he thought about a shellacking that his team took. He said, "We have to get better." Pearls of wisdom sometimes just jump out at you.

Quotes from the past?

"We have to get better." ----- Poland, 1939

"We have to get better." ----- Custer, 1876

Sometimes it just ain't that easy.

I haven't been able to watch much TV this week. I don't miss it. Then why will I sit all weekend and start plowing through the DVR'd episodes that I have recorded? Stupid, I guess, but I need to see David Caruso cock his head, say something cryptic, and put on his sunglasses. ----Classic!

What does this saying mean? "I wake up every morning like a baby duck. In a new world."
I use it a lot --- I hope it doesn't have terrible connotations.

People tell me that I'm ADD, but I don't th .... LOOK! a puppy!!!

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Thanks, lickfest, etc...

I would like to thank Jurlpower for her suggestions to spiff up my blogsite. I am a tourist in cyberspace. People younger than I are permanent residents. Some of them give good directions.

The inaugauration was quite a lickfest. The press (except for FOX) was all giddy about the new president. There has not been an inaugauration party like this since 1829. Farmers from all over the south and west came to DC to see one of their own, Andrew Jackson, sworn in. The party lasted for days at the White House. The only way they could get the people to leave was to move the whiskey to the front lawn. Quite a celebration!!

I hope this presidency doesn't culminate in the Trail of Tears and the Panic of 1837. But maybe Obama will get his picture on money. I already see coins being sold on TV emblazoned with his image.

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WEIRDNESS

I think it was weird that Garth Brooks was singing "American Pie" in front of the Lincoln Memorial. I don't know why I think it was weird.

When Stevie Wonder was singing, it looked like Barack wanted to break out the moves. He should have. He looked uncomfortable when he was restraining his groove.

I was hoping that "Abe" would pull out a giant mallet when Jack Black was pontificating about the environment. I wonder what kind of car Jack Black drives. It would have been great if he was conked on the head by the great emancipator.

Tomorrow will be an historic day. The 1400 days after tomorrow will be much more important, however.

Number One

Welcome.  You must have a lot of time on your hands to read this.  Posts to this blog will be reflective of my opinion on what is going on in the world, and even more importantly, in my own personal bubble.

Your comments are welcome, and will be answered, in this space.  I hope that we can develop a healthy debate on world, and life, issues.  My opinion, of course, will be the one showcased here, only because it is the one that is correct.

My views are influenced by Lenin and Marx.  John Lennon and Groucho Marx.  I will try to make my point without stepping on toes, however, you should wear shoes.

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